What Devilry is This?

Psst! Can I tell you a secret? Midlife is a c-r-a-z-y ride. Not what I expected at all. But, I’m having a ton of fun in between the…you know…near death experiences and bladder-testing moments of complete terror.  
Curse, curse, swear! How did midlife get so out of control? All I wanted was to make my own mark on the world. Start my own business and celebrate the end of an uninspiring marriage. Instead, I have a bat in my belfry. Not a metaphor…a REAL bat. The woods in my back yard is full of something dark from my nightmares. I’ve got a mysterious and sexy neighbor who seems to appear out of nowhere and knows more about my life than he should. And my best friends? Yeah, they’re witches.  
What the..? 
My life has become a carnival and I’m sitting at the OhMyGoddessNo! spot on the most heart-stopping roller coaster.  
Things are getting hairier than my chin. And midlife is definitely not shaping up to be the calm and graceful phase of life I’d been expecting. 
But, I’ve got a good grip on my granny panties and I’m taking the ride. What could possibly go wrong?